CJ Hollenbach

         We seemed to pick up right where we left off in our 25 year friendship. (Did we meet in kindergarten?) Then, the conversation turned UGLY when he talked about US getting OLD. I did have to interrupt and say “Speak for yourself!” Being my former workout partner he asked “Have you noticed how it’s MANDATORY that we have to do cardio at the gym now?” I concurred. He poked my stomach and noticed there was no “give” in the abdominal region. He looked at me and said “YOU F-CKER!!!” We both laughed like hell. That was the best compliment I’ve gotten in a long time. I spent the rest of the party drinking his birthday shots. Not sure when he stopped drinking. He just kept passing them to me and I just kept drinking them. For the record, I woke up the next morning hang-over free!

          March and April seem to BIG birthday months. Everyone I know seems to be turning a year older. I have lost count of how many cards I have sent out this week alone. Got a voicemail today from yet another friend who sarcastically reminded me that his birthday was “forgotten” by his drinking buddies, ME being one. I hated to send the e-mail response saying that he must have forgotten MY last birthday party that I planned MYSELF! I also had to remind him of the $30 worth of balloons that I schlepped down the street for decorations so it would look like a birthday party and not just a bunch of drunks standing around drinking. I DID that all MYSELF. I wasn’t about to boo-hoo it up because he didn’t get a &^%$# party. I sent him a card. Called twice and sent 2 birthday e-mails. Boy, suck it up!

             Off to the mail box with more cards. 3 more birthdays this week. Having dinner with my friend, Ann on Wed. Her birthday is tomorrow. My grandmother turns 97 April 8! Don’t forget to send her a card!

            Take this as a warning or a “don’t let this happen to YOU” message. Being the “computer Illiterate” that I am ( I can barely e-mail!) this should really come as no surprise. Recently I was sent a e-mail notice from what claimed to be my server, AOL. They said they were “updating” my billing info. I didn’t respond. A few days later I received a “final notice” e-mail again from what I thought was AOL. I looked everywhere for a phone number online or a e-mail address to contact someone at my server. I thought this e-mail night be bogus. They wanted my credit card info + a few other things. Having no luck with AOL and the e-mail DID look authentic, I decided to roll the dice and sent them the info.(It was also 2:30 in the morning when I sent it too!) I DID think it was strange that they asked for my credit card pin number which they didn’t need for billing. For some odd reason and I still don’t know WHY I sent them the pin number from another card and even that one wasn’t correct. Like I said it was 2:30 AM!!! I figured ALL my credit card info was still the same and the only reason they would need my pin # was to withdraw money and I was SURE they would NEVER do that! I also thought if there was a problem they could try calling ME for a change!

          A few days later I was at the checkout line at Wal-Mart and my credit card was denied. I told the cashier to run it through again because it was probably just wearing out from abuse. She did…SEVERAL times. All the while the line behind was getting longer and longer. There I was looking like white trash in Wal-Mart trying to charge on a bad card. I handed the girl another card and was on my way. She didn’t even look at it, but that’s another blog story….

         When I got home I called the credit card company to tell them I thought I needed a new card. The woman told me that my card was fine, but they did notice some “odd” charges being made so the card was BLOCKED. Turns out somebody had tried to make a cash withdrawal with my bogus pin number and then tried to make a charge for the same amount, $229.00! Thank God I was smart(?) enough not to give them the right pin number! There was also another charge made to FRANCE! I assured the woman from the card company that I wasn’t doing any cash withdrawls and people really should be wiring ME money NOT the other way around! My account on that card was closed and I was issued a new one.

        Then, I had to find someone at AOL to report this to. An hour or so later I was “instant messaging” a “live tech”. It took me that long to locate ANYONE to help me at AOL!!! I explained my dilemma to my tech “Sigfreid” or whatever he was calling himself. He asked me to send him the e-mail that I had received that started this whole mess. Within in seconds he said I had been SCAMMED! Had I been able to get in touch with someone easier at AOL this all could have been avoided. “Sigfreid” now tells me I need to REPORT this. I e-mailed back “Isn’t that what I just did?!!!!” The exclamation points were flowing fast and furious at this now. He e-mails back “You sound upset….” I replied “What the hell am I doing with YOU if you’re telling me to report it after I just reported it to YOU!!!!!! What are they paying YOU for?!!!” Magically and mysteriously he vanished and it said “session terminated” Odd….I got a e-mail seconds later from ol’ Sig saying he didn’t know WHY were cut off. OK, whatever….

        Long story longer….The SOB’s didn’t get any money out of me and I have learned a valuable lesson. I must have a Guardian angel watching out for me out there someplace….BEWARE!

         Went to the hairdresser’s last week. I took a copy of the artist, Jon Paul’s book “The Art Of Romance” that features me on the back cover + a few pages inside to show my hairdresser, Rayne.ALL the women at the salon swarmed around me like bees to catch a gander at the book of JP’s best cover art. They all loved it. One woman said she already had one of the book covers as a screensaver. The odd thing was later one of the hairdressers came over and asked me how I felt about “one-night stands”. She smiled and said “Me first, then Carol!” I guess they are looking at me in a different light now… The book is available at www.jonpaulstudios.com